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Is it okay to be ”Just me” and catch on my promises?

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How are you feeling today? 

The journey lately has been good pretty steady but also heart wrenching if I am honest, but there is something that caught my ear  recently my pastor said life is not a fanfare it is a warfare which I personally think its true, do you know that every decision we make births something in our life and that nothing in our life goes unremembered , this includes both the good and the bad, nothing we do goes in vain. 

So today lets talk about presentation, I want to tell you that who you are on the outside is a mirror of who you are on the inside and yes this includes personality and presentation, When I was not that deep with Jesus I mean getting deep with Jesus is a journey ,but it gets better the more you want to try with him and digest his words in your heart. 

 

Before I was deep in with Jesus Christ and his word, I use to be into listening a lot of rap and RnB and of course my main aim was dress to impress so I made sure I am at least pleased with myself every time before I go out but on the other hand there certain things that I craved in my life like a happy relationship ,marriage, kids and a good family and fulfilment but I noticed that people always had the wrong impression of who I was when they met me, now you cannot control how people feel about you or what they say about you but you can control who you choose to be. The fruit of who you truly are has to be seen in the public for you to magnetically attract the people that are meant for you, you cannot be controlled by your wounds or your past pain to the point where you do not see the bigger picture 

I read this somewhere 

Your beliefs become your thoughts, your thoughts become your words, your words become your actions, your actions become your values, and your values become your destiny 

But as you can see the main starter of it all is belief, who do you believe yourself to be , is who you will present yourself to be and people catch on to that pretty quickly, you need to walk like you know who you are called you to be, Greatness is within you but it takes you believing it to see it. 

MARK 11;24 

For whatever you ask for in prayer believe that you have recieved it and it shall be yours. 

You need FAITH, scratch everything else. 

 

Which leads me to presentation. 

If you want to be great you better walk like you are great now, everything else will catch on ,that’s why when God wants to make you he has to break you first, to break every lie that you have believed of yourself and give you a firm foundation of who you are but it is truly up to you to let go, I know it was hard for me I said God it took me so many years of hiding just for me to be this cool and confident and when God called me he took it all away. 

 

I didn’t understand, I kept on telling myself I don’t have to loose it all to be with God but that’s a lie, you do have to loose it all to be with God, because everything you have was probably built on pride or ego or pain and not on truth, it takes a lot of humbleness to see everything go down just like that but a lot of understanding to know that God is building it with you now , Jesus is re building your house and it hurts because he wants you to have the right foundation so anything that might be shakeable he has to break, I am teaching myself patience as God is working on me , I am teaching myself humbleness to know who is in charge of my ship and most of all Jesus is teaching me rest in this season. When you have been in pain you are so used to picking up the pieces and finding a way to patch up the hole so life goes on but when it comes to God , Jesus and the Holy spirit baby they will take the whole broken building down and build a new one with you.  

Jesus Christ in Luke 5;36  

36He also told them a parable: “No one tears a piece from a new garment and puts it on an old garment. If he does, he will tear the new, and the piece from the new will not match the old. 37And no one puts new wine into old wineskins. If he does, the new wine will burst the skins and it will be spilled, and the skins will be destroyed. 38But new wine must be put into fresh wineskins. 39And no one after drinking old wine desires new, for he says, ‘The old is good.’” 

 

You need to be able to let go of everything you thought you were this includes, your type in men, your dressing style, your presentation , your everything and begin to allow God to work on your house all afresh, be like a child who is new in the world and doesn’t know anything therefore depends on his or her Fathers guidance in everything he or she does, that’s how you should be do not and please do not allow the Culture or the society to fool you into thinking that you don’t need to let go of the music or the way you dress because Jesus sees your heart, its true he does see your heart and he wants to make me and you new wine but he cannot pour it into old wineskins for our old ways have to go if we are going to inherit his Kingdom and all his promises. 

 

It will not be easy and at times your heart may be hardened to let go of certain parts of your personality that you thought defined you, that’s why Jesus said that no one drinks the new wine and desires it for the old one is good, that is why you need to allow yourself to become new so you may eventually become old but its a warfare you need to pick the new side every time , I know I kept on looking back at the past telling myself I was more fun and nice wishing to go back to those days because right now my heart is struggling but pain is good because it means I’m in my shedding season, but today Jesus reminds you and me that new wine has to go in new wineskins other wise will you will loose both yourself and the new person God is trying to make of?, I pray for us that God may humble our hearts enough to seek him and build our houses on rocks that do not shake or fall, Truth God is continually making me new with his new mercies every morning , rebuilding parts of my life but ensuring that they are being built on a firm and steady foundation. 

 

And he can do it for you too, but we need to let go of our pride and who we thought we were and go unto his feet with nothing but our broken hearts ,for in order to make it he will have to break it and give us a new heart and identity in him and sometimes that process is not so pretty but give your self and Jesus time and soon everything will work out for the greater good of those who are called according to his purpose. 

 

I love you and we are in this together. 

 

Don’t forget to reach out to me in-case of anything like a counselling or just chat with a friend, I’m your friend because you and me both are daughters and sons of the same Father spirit so we are not only friends but siblings. 

God loves you more than you can ever imagine but he also wants you to get serious about your soul and life’s future. 

 

Take care, 

Dada Irene. 

 

 

 

 

Your daily dose of love?

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Is your soul free or is it in a Cage?

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Breaking Free from the Soul’s Cage

I came to a discovery a few days ago: so many people have their souls trapped because of the failure to let go. If you do not let go of what hurt you, you only trap your soul. Though your spirit may be with you, constantly reminding you of what you have lost, your body will send you signals to alert you of the danger ahead.

Feeding Demons or Angels: The Power of Words

Speaking ill, slander, or dwelling in pain is what demons feed on. Positivity and good energy are what Angels feed on. So, you get to choose who to feed into. I’m not one to say depression isn’t real because I have experienced it firsthand and know exactly what it is. But pitying yourself for the pain you went through will not help anyone, especially you.

The decision to let go is yours. Yes, it’s a journey—a hard, ugly process—but one worth taking. Get out of your mind and force yourself to stop replaying the events that happened to you. That’s how you break free.

The Power to Control Your Thoughts

You have the power and authority to stop and control any thoughts that come into your mind. Some of those thoughts aren’t even yours. I learned recently that it’s like a web or a cage we trap ourselves in with our words. Words have power and authority over your life and those around you. Some may argue that talking about the problem helps, but I would argue otherwise: stay quiet about it and take it to God in prayer.

When you speak, demons listen. They are attracted to self-pity and an unwillingness to let go. That’s when depression kicks in. They fuel the constant replaying of painful events, the constant thought that people are out to get you. Slowly, you absorb the energy of those around you instead of your own, trapping yourself further.

The First Step to Freedom: Forgiveness

But God, through Jesus Christ, in His divine mercy, will not stop pursuing you. He may send people to encourage you, but you must be willing to forgive those who’ve hurt you. Forgiveness is the first step to freeing yourself from the trap you’ve built.

No matter what someone has done to you, do not speak ill of them. If you have, repent and ask God to forgive you. Do not think ill of them either. Ill thoughts will attract darkness into you, and you will lose yourself. It’s hard, but it’s the better route for your soul.

Overcoming Evil by Doing Good

Everyone is both a villain and a hero in someone else’s life—that’s the point of the human experience. But I deeply encourage you to forgive others and try to do good. God’s Word says to overcome evil by doing good. Spend quiet time with God and listen to what He has to say. That solitude will slowly heal you. Don’t complain, don’t think of those who hurt you. Focus on your relationship with your Creator.

Your little self is waiting for you to rescue him or her. They are stuck in a web of your own words, waiting for you to set them free by not letting past experiences define your whole life.

Take Every Thought Captive

Take every thought captive and give it to God. Every thought that comes into your mind, you can control. Pride is dangerous—it’s the root of all evil in my opinion. Whether it’s low self-pride or the belief that you deserve more while others deserve less, pride fosters evil within you.

God loves the humble of heart. The moment pride takes over, and you think you are better than those who’ve hurt you, the problem begins. You start to exalt yourself over your pain and over others. We are all equal in the Lord’s eyes. We are unique and special, but we are not better than others.

Daily Spiritual Battle

We can be free—the power is within us. The same power that raised Jesus from the dead resides in us. The power to set ourselves free is in our minds. Every day is a spiritual battle in your thoughts, actions, and choices. Feed your spirit daily so you know what is good for you in every situation.

The knowledge to win is available for all of us, but we must be willing to cultivate it. The Holy Spirit is here to support us, and prayer is always our number one weapon. Let’s use it wisely.

Testimony of Forgiveness

I have a testimony. I struggled to forgive a few people. Some were people I had already forgiven in the past, but when your soul is trapped, old wounds are reopened. I was determined to forgive, not knowing that I needed forgiveness too.

When I realized I had slandered someone’s name, ruining their reputation, I felt deep sorrow. My sin was bigger than theirs. I asked God to forgive me, and once He did, I focused on controlling my thoughts to avoid further sinning. I reconnected with God in solitude, determined to be myself again. It’s not a linear process, but one day at a time, we will make it out fully.

A Challenge for You

I challenge you to reflect on your life decisions and what you’re holding onto. Search deep for what constantly has you battling yourself. Focus on healing and letting go. It’s never too late. No matter how long you’ve been in that cage, there’s light when you decide to let go and choose your words and actions carefully.

If you need to talk, I’m here. Feel free to share your story with me, and I can guide you through a prayer of letting go, one that will be specifically given to us by the Holy Spirit.

Prayer of Letting Go

Jesus Christ I thank you for being my anchor and for dying for my sins for my forgiveness sake, I thank you for forgiveness over me and all those who have wronged me, I thank you for your mercy and for you everlasting love, I come to you with a heart full of humbleness and sin asking you to cleanse me and give me a new perspective and a new name just as you had given Jacob as the father of Israel, and I ask you to strengthen my relationship with you so as my soul my stay grounded in your love, thank you for allowing love in my life and for going to the extremes just to get me back in you, for I am yours and you are mine, remove any illness and bondage that may still be holding me back and release me of any bondage that is holding me back from you. I ask for Your forgiveness for the times I’ve spoken ill, held onto resentment, or fuelled negativity in my life. I repent of my sins and ask that You heal my heart. Help me to forgive those who’ve hurt me, just as You’ve forgiven me. Give me the strength to control my thoughts and words, to resist the enemy, and to walk in Your light. Set me free from the traps I’ve built, and help me to release my soul into Your hands. In Jesus’ name, Amen. 

 

Your daily dose of love?

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Counterfeit Peace: Overcoming the Lies of Addiction

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To Know an Addiction is to Know Yourself

What do I mean by this? Addictions are often attempts to fill a part of ourselves we’re trying to suppress or escape. They provide a false sense of peace—temporary, counterfeit relief that fades, leaving us empty again.

For example, weed might offer a sense of relaxation, a calmness that feels like peace, or even joy that makes life seem lighter for a while. But this is not true peace, and it’s certainly not the peace that comes from the Lord. The soul, created by God, was designed to be filled with real peace, love, and power. As 2 Timothy 1:7 says, “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind.”

The Enemy’s Counterfeit Peace

Everything created by God responds to His word, including our spirits. Your spirit craves what it was designed for: love, power, and a sound mind. Yet, the enemy knows this, and he uses things like alcohol, weed, and drugs to offer a fake version of what your spirit truly seeks. The more you indulge in these substances, the more you crave them—not because they satisfy, but because they momentarily fill the void that only God can truly fill.

When you take these substances, they don’t just affect your body; they influence your spirit. It’s like handing over control of your body to something else, allowing other spirits to reside in you. Have you ever noticed that people often forget what happened when they were drunk or high? That’s because they’ve surrendered part of their being to another force. Some might remain more aware than others, but the ultimate goal is the same: these spirits want to take over, suppressing the God-given spirit inside you.

Understanding Your Wounds

As I discussed in my previous blog about spiritual trauma, it’s important to ask yourself: What am I running from? What part of me feels empty or wounded? Is it fear, rejection, loneliness, or unhappiness? Knowing your wound is the first step toward healing. Just as a doctor needs to understand your symptoms to treat you, you need to understand your spiritual pain to bring it to God for healing.

The False Peace of Addiction

Each day, take one step closer to healing by reminding yourself that the peace you seek from addiction is false. The joy you experience is fleeting, masked by substances. But true joy, true peace, is real—and it’s waiting for you. You are not a slave to the lies the enemy feeds you.

As Luke 10:19 says, “Behold, I have given you authority to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy, and nothing shall hurt you.”

Claiming Your Authority

You have authority over anything that binds you to temporary pleasures. Your spirit was created to soar, not to be held down by falseness and lies. The truth lives within you, but you must be willing to seek it.

Jesus is the ultimate healer. He knows your wounds, and He can offer you true peace and freedom. You don’t have to walk in deception any longer—He will break the chains that bind you. The enemy operates in systems, trying to trap you in cycles of misery because he doesn’t know your future, and that terrifies him. Misery might love company, but it needs company to survive. Yet, when God turns your misery into truth, you’ll no longer seek false company to fill the void.

Walking the Path to Freedom

Now, I’m not saying it will be easy. But God will walk with you every step of the way. All He asks for is your willingness to be free. He’s already died for your freedom, and He took that pain on Himself so you don’t have to. You just need to take what burdens you and follow Him.

There’s nothing that God cannot restore. No story is too complicated for Him. Addiction will not lead you to freedom; it will trap you and torture you in the long run. Don’t lose your dreams, your aspirations, or the person God called you to be. God’s mercies are new every morning, and His love for you is greater than anything you could imagine.

You Are Worthy of True Peace

You are worthy of experiencing true peace, real joy, and the fullness of life that God has for you. Take a leap of faith, trust in His love, and leave the rest to Him.

I love you, but Jesus loves you more!

Your daily dose of love?

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Are the beliefs you have about your identity true?

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I’m not a psychologist, nor do I hold a degree in mental health, but I do walk with the Holy Spirit. While I’m not here to present this as professional advice, I want to share a pattern I’ve noticed, one that might resonate with some of you. What I say, I say with love and obedience.

It seems that many of us lack love these days. True love has become rarer than stumbling upon money in the street. Why? Because our culture has normalized things that are untrue or unhealthy, fostering a world where many are self-centered, caring only about what they can gain from others. As a result, we find ourselves surrounded by wounded souls—people hiding their pain beneath layers of pride and ego, searching for an identity, even if it’s false, to give them a sense of belonging.

Where love is absent, anything can take root.

Many who have been hurt in relationships—whether with men or women—end up believing lies about themselves, lies planted by the enemy. Remember, the devil comes to steal, kill, and destroy. He doesn’t build anything. His lies, especially those close to our pain, can feel so intertwined with our truth that it’s easy to mistake them for reality. But let’s be clear: pain creates space for lies. Do not allow those lies to define you.

A lack of love from those who should have loved you doesn’t rewrite the identity God gave you. It only creates a false identity, a false sense of belonging, and a counterfeit form of love.

For instance, if you’re a woman who has never had true, supportive friends, and suddenly meet someone who genuinely cares, it’s easy to confuse that with romantic love. But that’s not always the case. You might simply be experiencing the kind of friendship and love you were always meant to have, but lacked. Similarly, if you’ve never had a partner who truly cherished you, your brain might misinterpret healthy interactions as something more significant than they are. This happens because your mind has grown used to poor or unhealthy relationships, and anything good feels unfamiliar.

It’s essential to understand that just because love was absent when you needed it most doesn’t mean you’re unworthy of it now. The enemy works through thoughts and people, manipulating our understanding of ourselves. Don’t let anyone else define who you are. Don’t allow your thoughts to overtake the identity God has called you to walk in.

You are not imperfect, and yes, God still loves you just as you are. When He looks at you, He sees a broken child in a cruel world—but one who is deeply loved. And remember, love comes in many forms. Not all love is romantic, and love is never lustful. Love can be the simple, everyday things that often go unnoticed:

  • Love is your mother making your favorite dish.
  • Love is your father sacrificing all he has just to see you smile.
  • Love is a friend hugging you when you need it most.
  • Love is a sibling loving you despite your faults.
  • Love is a stranger offering a compliment or a kind word.

Love is being forgiven. Love is forgiving others. It’s the light that flickers even in the darkest moments. Love is being yourself around those you feel safe with. It’s accepting yourself for who God created you to be. It’s seeing the beauty and good in life when everything else feels overwhelming.

If the enemy has tried to rob you of love, don’t let him fool you into changing your God-given identity. If you feel lost, know that it’s not too late. Hold on to your faith, because love, in all its forms, is already around you, waiting to be discovered.

I love you, but Jesus loves you more.

Your daily dose of love?

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Soul Ties vs. Soulmates: The Spiritual Science Behind Relationships

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Introduction: We often think of soulmates as those special people destined to be with us forever, driven by an undeniable chemistry or a deep, intrinsic connection. However, this common understanding can sometimes lead us astray, and many good-hearted people have been misled by this belief.

Understanding Soul Ties: In spiritual terms, a soul tie is a deep connection that binds two people together, creating a spiritual link or portal. This bond becomes even stronger if the two individuals have been physically intimate, as though they were husband and wife, even if they’re not each other’s destined partner from God. A soul tie is akin to a cord, much like the one that connects a mother to her child through the placenta. This spiritual cord can cause you to share emotions and energies with the other person, making the connection profound and far-reaching.

How Soul Ties Affect You: Just as a mother’s nourishment affects her child, the spiritual connection through a soul tie can impact you deeply. If you’re tied to someone who is involved with others, their energy and those connections can affect you too. God has given each of us a soul filled with dreams, spirit, drive, and ambitions—qualities that are especially significant for women.

The Spiritual Role of Women: Women possess a unique spiritual strength, which is why the Bible says, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing.” Women carry an abundance of spiritual gifts that can bless a man. When you form a soul tie with someone, you share this spiritual wealth. But if the man’s values and behavior are contrary to yours, it’s like mixing light and darkness. Often, darkness can spread rapidly within this bond, leading to negative changes in your behavior or a decline in your life perhaps finacially, emotionally or even  physically, while your partner might thrive off your spiritual strength.This might also include mental illness like depression or anxiety or even certain behaviours ever noticed that when two people are together and one is a smoker but the other isn’t it becomes so much easier for the non smoker to suddenly adapt such like behaviours from his partner although rare vice versa can be true and so its essential as a woman to choose wisely who you decide to favour spiritually because truthfully not every man is deserving of that energy and not every man is your man. And remember he who finds a wife finds favour upon the lords eyes, contray to what most people believe spiritually marriage is union between man and woman as husband and life although culturally its phrased more as a ceremony rather than a sacred union.

The Dangers of Soul Ties: Soul ties can be harmful, damaging your soul and diverting you from your true destiny. These ties might also manifest as spiritual spouses—entities that gain access to you through sin, such as premarital sex or other forms of sexual immorality. These spirits attach themselves to you, altering your spiritual identity and making it harder for you to recognize and connect with the person God intended for you.They also take a lot of your energy and so they deprive you of your talents and goals ever noticed when a woman leaves a toxic man or vice versa they become healthier and it becomes easier for them to accomplish their goals , this is because no one is feeding off their energy.

Breaking Free from Soul Ties: To break free from a soul tie, you need to seek God’s help through prayer, repentance, and fasting. It’s crucial to ask God to reveal who you need to cut ties with and how to do so, as this will vary from person to person. This process is vital because the choices you make in relationships affect your entire life’s trajectory, including your dreams, desires, peace, and joy.

Conclusion: Remember, God loves you and is always on your side. Be strong and courageous enough to recognize when someone isn’t meant for you and to walk away from that relationship. The longer you remain in a harmful connection, the stronger the soul tie becomes, making it even harder to break. Love yourself enough to prioritize your spiritual well-being and your God-given destiny over any temporary connection.

I pray that God grants you the strength to leave what isn’t meant for you, the grace to forgive, and the courage to let go. Always remember, I love you, but God—the “Big Boss”—loves you even more!

Your daily dose of love?

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THE SPIRITUAL SCIENCE BEHIND TRAUMA

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A Broken Girl’s Journey

I’m not a doctor or psychologist, but I am a broken girl. Inside me, there are countless pieces, each holding a fragment of pain. I’ve been hurt more times than I can count, yet I keep giving myself to others, trying to understand, not because I truly do, but because I know how hurt can change a person. Hurt can push you into hiding, make you fear love, life, and even yourself. It breeds anger and pride, turning you into someone unrecognizable.

Hurt triggers emotions like fear, anger, and pride, the natural human responses. Spiritually, we know these are part of the “flesh,” emotions that overshadow faith, hope, and love—the essence of our God-given spirit. Trauma, then, is not just emotional baggage, but something darker, meant to destroy us. It often comes from others’ actions, leaving us to carry the burden for something we didn’t cause. It’s like a heavy cloud, a pain in the chest that therapy might guide us through, but prayer is the ultimate weapon to fight it.

The enemy wants us trapped in our minds, replaying our pain, dissociating from the present. He amplifies that negativity, turning it into a part of us. But there’s a way out: prayer, breath, and mindfulness. Focus on the beauty around you, the simple blessings, and get out of your head. The mind can be a dangerous place to live.

True freedom comes when we face our trauma, not through numbing agents like alcohol or drugs, but by feeling it and letting God shift our perspective. We’re not fighting people; we’re battling forces that aim to steal our dreams and our future. Every child starts with innocent dreams, but over time, trauma steals that innocence, turning hope into doubt. The enemy’s mission is to kill, steal, and destroy—your mind, your joy, your future.

But Jesus has given us the authority to fight back. Luke 10:19 says, “I have given you authority to tread on serpents and scorpions and over all the power of the enemy, and nothing shall hurt you.” It’s time to reclaim what’s been stolen from you—your dreams, your innocence, your true self. Before the pain, before the distractions, before the world told you otherwise, there was joy and hope. It’s time to live in that place again, with true happiness in your heart.

We need you Doc(JESUS).

Your daily dose of love?

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Do you love what you see in the mirror?

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Jealousy: An Illusion of Lack

Jealousy is often an illusion, a spirit born from insecurity and a sense of lack. It tricks us into focusing on what others have, making us forget our own blessings. My pastor once said, “God gives each of us enough fuel—enough grace—to fulfill our God-given purpose.” Even grace is measured uniquely for each of us. The enemy, however, uses our thoughts and others’ lives to deceive us, convincing us that what we have isn’t enough.

Jealousy robs us of our God-given confidence, often mistaken for pride. Pride is the offspring of false confidence, which itself is birthed from jealousy. Our thoughts can become our greatest enemy, but with God’s help, we can break free. Only He can remind us of who we truly are and restore our authentic, God-given confidence.

It’s easy to fall into jealousy when we aren’t fully secure in ourselves. Once you start seeing life through the lens of lack, that’s all you’ll notice—lack in beauty, achievements, family, and more. You can’t catch your own blessings if you’re too focused on someone else’s. Instead, look at your perceived lack and ask God to turn it into abundance. It’s not easy, but with God, nothing is impossible.

We must walk the path God has set for us, sitting in the chairs He has prepared. Each of us has our own journey, our own role. If you focus too much on someone else’s life, you may miss your turn. But it’s never too late with God. Give your heart to Him, and allow Him to humble you, so you won’t confuse your path with someone else’s or mistake confidence for pride.

Jealousy is a toxic disease that rots the heart, spreading quickly like an infection. Its danger lies in its subtle growth, often unnoticed until it takes root in the soul. Flee from jealousy wherever it appears, and when you feel its grip, run to God for healing. The price at stake is your own blessing, the one God intended for you.

Psalm 26:1 says, “Vindicate me, O Lord, for I have led a blameless life; I have trusted in the Lord without wavering. For your love is ever before me, and I walk continually in your truth.”

“I choose to forgive so I may be forgiven. The path is hard, but since when has anything easy birthed something good? I let go, proclaiming a good future for us all. Perhaps then, you’ll understand that my chair can never be yours, no matter how hard you try.”

Your daily dose of love?

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How does your heart play a huge role in your lifestyle and life choices?

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The Essence of the Heart: Desires, Fulfillment, and Divine Love

Our hearts are the epicenter of our existence, the source from which all life flows—not just from a scientific perspective, but a spiritual one as well. When God instructs us to guard our hearts, He does so out of deep, unconditional love, aiming to guide us toward what is truly good for us. This means protecting our deepest desires and aspirations is crucial. Often, the notion of our desires is discussed but not truly grasped. In our rapidly changing world, filled with pressures from social media and other external influences, we may begin to view ourselves from a perspective of scarcity rather than abundance.

God intends for the desires of our hearts to seek truth, love, and genuine peace. This pursuit helps us understand who we truly are. However, many of us have been influenced by the world’s standards, leading us to crave things that do not nourish our souls. We chase after material wealth, external validation, and transient pleasures—things that may momentarily satisfy our flesh but ultimately leave our souls empty.

There’s a saying, “He died alone,” which is often feared. But let’s examine this from a spiritual viewpoint. Regardless of our status—married, single, or surrounded by people—death is a solitary experience. We confront our own minds and souls in those final moments. No matter how much we accumulate or achieve, when the end comes, it is just us and our souls, our memories, and our beliefs. Material possessions and worldly achievements become irrelevant; only our inner state matters.

Consider this: money, fame, and physical attractiveness are fleeting. True peace, joy, and love are the soul’s deep desires, and they can only be fulfilled through a relationship with God. Our bodies, which will eventually be left behind, are temporary. Our souls are eternal, and they need to be nurtured. If our souls are unhealthy, our lives become hollow.

Many of us live like walking corpses, our souls weakened by a focus on external validation rather than internal truth. Each day we awaken, we have a chance to realign ourselves—to live more wisely and in accordance with our true purpose. God’s grace gives us this opportunity to find fulfillment and authenticity.

Desiring to be loved or needed by others is not the ultimate goal. Instead, we should seek to understand our own truth. Our feelings are variable and unreliable; they shift and change. True love, as described in the Bible, is not just a feeling but an action—demonstrated by Jesus’ ultimate sacrifice. To be loved is to be truly known and valued for who we are, not for what we provide.

God’s love is constant and abundant. Even if we feel let down by others or if our expectations aren’t met, divine love is ever-present. Trust in God to fulfill you, rather than relying on fleeting human affection or approval. When we go to God, we don’t need to be perfect. We simply need to ask Him to transform our desires and guide our actions. His grace allows us to start anew each day, offering us the chance to nourish both our bodies and souls.

Reflecting on my own journey, I’ve come to understand the depth of God’s love and grace through my experiences and mistakes. The world can be harsh and disillusioning, often failing to meet our idealistic expectations. Yet, in the midst of this, God’s love remains a guiding light. As a former lost soul who has found her way back to divine truth, I hope to share this message: we are all engaged in a struggle against forces that seek to diminish our dreams. But with God’s guidance, we can rise above and find our way.

“The world is a cruel place we live in, created and born to shine yet so many of us are stuck in a cycle of suffering, influenced by forces that steal our dreams. They say misery loves company, but I argue that misery needs company to survive. We fight a war we may not fully understand, but I choose to use my voice to proclaim truth and hope.”

1 Samuel 2:9: “For the pillars of the earth are the LORD’S, and He has set the world upon them.”

Your daily dose of love?

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The Illusion of Being Needed vs. The Power of Being Loved”

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Hi My Loves,

Let’s talk about something we often confuse: the difference between being needed and being loved. It’s not a topic that comes up often, but it’s one I believe we should address—especially because many of us, myself included, have found ourselves in difficult situations where this distinction gets blurry.

What Does It Mean to Be Needed?

Let’s start with the definition of need—a circumstance in which something is necessary; a necessity. As women, we are often naturally optimistic and nurturing, which is why God chose us to be mothers, emotionally strong enough to handle deep feelings while maintaining our sense of self. Many of us carry hope within us—hope for a good family, a loving husband, wonderful children, and a bright future. These are all beautiful things to desire, but if we aren’t careful, hope can quickly transform into desperation.

So why do women stay with men who continually treat them poorly? If you ask, many will say, “I love him.” They’ll tell you they see a future with him, but deep down, many of these women are simply desperate for love. The truth is, the men need these women, but they don’t necessarily love them. Some women may even find comfort in controlling a broken man, knowing that his weaknesses make him easier to manage. This can provide a false sense of power and security—knowing that the man relies on them.as if controlling a broken man validates their worth.

The Male Perspective

From a male perspective, it’s crucial to recognize that a man can need a woman without truly loving her. Men, especially those who are emotionally or mentally struggling, might rely on a woman’s support when their world crumbles. They might see a good woman as a valuable asset, someone who will stick by them through thick and thin. In their minds, this woman is a source of stability, even if they are not prepared to give back the same level of commitment. Men might hold onto such a woman not out of genuine love but because they know they have a lot of internal work to do, and a dependable woman provides comfort and stability during their struggles.

These men may be aware that they have internal work to do, and they’ll cling to the woman they need because they know she’ll tolerate them when others won’t. When she tries to leave, they make temporary efforts to fix the situation, not out of love, but to keep her around. To them, it’s like having a garden full of beautiful flowers. The woman, acting as the caretaker, maintains the garden, but the man—the owner—has the power to disrupt it anytime, without considering the effort it took her to make it beautiful.

And so what is crucial is to know who you are dealing with and recognising that it is not your job to control or to fix anyone , Men are often practical, thinking more about what they gain than what they lose. They recognize a good woman when they see one, and many will hold onto her—not because of love, but because they know she’ll stick by them when times get tough.And Remember that no one will show up for you more than you.

The Essence of True Love

The Bible offers a profound definition of love. True love is not merely a fleeting feeling but an action—a choice to care for someone deeply. There’s a timeless definition of love in the Bible that goes beyond mere feelings. Love is an action, not a fleeting emotion. If Jesus had only said, “I love you,” without taking action, we wouldn’t have believed it. Instead, He showed His love by sacrificing Himself for us, defeating death to prove His commitment. So, we must not take His sacrifice for granted by choosing suffering in our relationships over the love He desires for us.

In 1 Corinthians 13:4, it says: Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.

The Difference Between Being Loved and Being Needed

Being loved means being valued for who you are, without conditions. It’s about being appreciated for your true self, not for what you can provide or fix. In contrast, being needed can sometimes mean you’re valued for what you do rather than who you are. While it’s natural to want to feel needed, true fulfillment comes from being loved in a way that respects and cherishes you completely.

Breaking Free from Unhealthy Patterns

To avoid confusion between need and love, focus on understanding your worth and recognizing what a healthy relationship looks like. Remember that true love is patient, kind, and selfless. It does not involve control or manipulation but is built on mutual respect and genuine care.

If you find yourself in a situation where you’re needed rather than loved, take a step back and assess the relationship. Seek guidance through prayer, reflection, or counseling. Remember, your value isn’t tied to how much you’re needed but to the love and respect you deserve.

With love,

As you navigate relationships, let’s strive for genuine love over the illusion of need. Embrace the beauty of being loved for who you are and allow yourself to be cherished in a relationship that honors your true self.

May you find peace and fulfillment in the love you deserve.

With love and strength,

Irene

 

 

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